Currently I am sitting in my little 3 bedroom home in Kitchener, Ontario with my incredible husband of 1.5 years and our Boston Terrier Zara. These two bring so much joy and happiness in my life, I truly have never felt more blessed. But it hasn’t always been like that…Here’s my story: I grew up in Toronto with my family in a Christian home and I came to know my “now” husband in 2010 from a common friend. We have about 4.5 years between us, so the first 2 years we talked on and off but that didn’t end up going anywhere and we broke it off assuming that was the end of the relationship. A month or so after I graduated high school, I truly believed in my heart that this relationship would never move forward and I had accepted that. Soon after, I was invited to a good-bye party for a friend in common and we rekindled our relationship that evening and started dating FOR REAL that time.
It took a game of playing 21 questions and getting him to actually ask me out officially, haha. Which by the way: side note: My husband has been the only person I have been with and dated. I know… rare right? Dating had its ups and downs, especially since we lived about 1.5 hours away from each other, but in those first couple months, we fell in love. Right before our 3 year dating anniversary, my boyfriend became my fiance and 10 months after that, he became my husband.
He was my only true love and my best friend. I know it may be rare but due to my Christian faith, I saved myself for marriage. I got made fun of, called virgin Mary many times but it was the best gift I could’ve given my husband on our wedding day.
My heart, mind and body fully belonged to Him as we became one in May 2016. I thought since we finally didn’t have to drive hours to see each other and spend endless hours on the phone talking every night that marriage would be pure bliss. It hurts to say this: but it wasn’t… I am ashamed at times and embarrassed to say that a few months into marriage- it was a disaster and we didn’t think our “til death due us part” was a reality anymore. I have always heard that the first year of marriage is hard but living that truth was even harder.
Soon two people that dated and loved each other and vowed to be together forever didn’t even want to sleep in the same room anymore. There were many factors that caused distance between us like cultural differences, medical issues and finances.
Due to our beliefs and Christianity, the word divorce has NEVER been an option for us but we were ready to call it quits. It was by the grace of God that our eyes were opened. On our 6 month anniversary of being married, we decided to give it one last try and watched our wedding video for the first time and in that moment, we remembered why God brought us together and why we loved each other.
We understood that love wasn’t based only on feelings or those googly eyes and butterflies in your stomach, but that loving someone was a decision you make each and every morning. We may not have been the perfect compatible couple in people’s eyes since we came from very different backgrounds and cultures, but God brought us together because we balance each other out.
When you understand the love God has for us as His children, you understand the love that we are called to show each other and to forgive in times of hurt and to love harder in times when you feel betrayed or alone. We remembered why we chose to do this “forever” thing together. So yes, we celebrated our beautiful one year anniversary in Greece and Paris and now working towards celebrating our 2nd and 3rd and 4th with no doubt in our minds that we are meant to be and were called to be partners to do this thing called life with, explore the world with, build a family with and to worship and glorify God with.
No marriage is perfect, but choose to love a hard, selfless and beautiful love and that could get you as close to perfect as you can get. God bless,